Time To Get Serious!

For all of my partying friends this New Year's Eve Weekend.

December 2005

Did you know that if you choose to drink and drive and get involved in an accident in which someone is killed that you can be sentenced to serve 15 years in a Florida Correctional Institution? Or if two people die in the accident you can spend 30 years locked away? Thirty years, think about that really hard. I didn’t. I never thought it could happen to me. I thought the worst that could happen is that I could get pulled over and get a DUI. If that had ever happened, I’m sure I would have thought about it a little harder, but until then, no worries. I knew people who got DUI’s in high school. It really didn’t seem like that big a deal. They paid their fine, lost their license for six months and caught rides with friends until they got their hardship license for school. An accident where someone gets killed, well, that was just not going to happen. Not in a million years did I ever think it could happen to me, or that I could end up where I am today.

My name is Eric Smallridge, or I should say, it was. My new identity is Inmate P22679. I am currently serving a 22-year sentence in the Florida Department of Corrections for my role in an accident that claimed the lives of two beautiful, twenty-year-old girls, Meagan Napier and Lisa Dickson. I had been drinking. I have been incarcerated for a little over two years in which I have had plenty of time to think about the consequences of drinking and driving. Everyday I wish that I had taken DUI more seriously and heeded the advice not to drink and drive. I had a great life full of opportunity and promise, a wonderful family, lots of friends, a beautiful girlfriend and I had just received my bachelor’s degree in Management Information Systems. In a split second, everything changed. It may be too late for me, but I really hope that telling you about the miserable realities of my life in a Florida prison will help you make better choices than I did.

You may have seen the television show “Oz”. If not, it is (or was) a show about a maximum- security prison that is extremely violent. I think it’s a bit exaggerated. Prison is more like the movie “Groundhog’s Day”, which is about a guy (Bill Murray) who keeps repeating the same day over and over again. Prison is very repetitive. My daily routine hasn’t changed at all since I arrived: Wake up at 4:45 a.m., breakfast at 5:00 a.m., count time 6:30 a.m., report to work at 7:00 a.m., work until 10:00 a.m., return to the dorm for 10:30 a.m. count, lunch begins at 11:00 a.m. and then back to work until returning to the dorm for 3:30 p.m. count, dinner begins at 4:00 p.m. then back to the dorm, 5:30 p.m. count, 9:00 p.m. count, and finally, lights out at 10:00 p.m. Sleep is a blessed relief because at least then my mind can be in another place and time. Now, don’t get me wrong, prison can be a very violent place. After all, many people here are incarcerated for horrible, violent crimes. There are murderers, rapists, child predators, drug pushers, aggravated batterers and more. Since I’ve been here, people have been stabbed, others severely beaten, and on one occasion, a guy had his finger bitten off. The institution where I am is supposed to be one of the least violent. I’ll leave it to you to imagine what goes on at other Florida institutions. While violence is ever-present, it isn’t what makes prison life so hard to endure.

One of the hardest things is thinking about all that I had taken for granted in my life, and how horribly I have messed up not only my life, but also the lives of so many others.If I were to talk about all the things I took for granted as a free man, I’d be writing for a very long time. But the list of really important things begins with my freedom itself. When I was a free man I never even thought about what freedom meant to me. Now I think about it all the time. I have no freedom of choice. I am told what to wear, what to eat, when to eat and how fast to eat. The menu is repeated week after week and you eat what they give you or you don’t eat. I cannot choose to use the bathroom by myself or take a shower by myself. I live in a dorm with 69 other “roommates” that I didn’t choose and most of whom I wouldn’t ever have wanted to associate with. Our bunk beds are barely 24” apart and there is no way to isolate myself from them or their constant noise. If I have a headache or am not feeling well, the best I can do is pull my bed covers over my head. There is no privacy in prison; the guards must be able to see me at all times no matter where I go.

At this institution, as well as many others in Florida, all inmate movement is controlled. There are actually red lines painted on the sidewalks and we must walk inside the red lines at all times. Another thing I took for granted while free was the ability to pick up a phone and call my family and friends whenever I felt like it. Phone access is very limited in prison. It literally takes months to get a phone number approved so I can call it, and I am only allowed to have 10 approved numbers on my calling list. There are only two telephones for all 70 men crammed in each dorm to use, and they are only turned on a few hours each evening. When I do get to make a phone call, the calls are limited to 15 minutes and I have to call collect knowing that the person I am calling will be charged anywhere from $8 to $20 (depending on their service provider). No one can ever call me, not even in times of family emergencies, such as when my grandmother passed away very unexpectedly this summer.

Visiting with family and friends had always been a huge part of my life that I had taken for granted. It is especially difficult during the holidays and other special occasions like marriages and reunions. I never realized how very precious all those moments were and how much they meant to me, or how much it meant to my family and friends that I be there with them. Now that isn’t an option for any of us.In prison, no one can just “come for a visit.” The only way I can visit with anyone is if they go through a long and frustrating application process. Only 15 people can be on my approved visitation list at one time, and only five of them can come to see me on a given day. Those that are approved to visit have to drive about 100 miles each way and if five people are already there, they get turned away. Visitation conditions are far from ideal and privacy is nonexistent. We are allowed one hug as they enter and one when they leave. On a busy weekend, there may be upwards of 180 people visiting and everyone sits across from each other at these long common tables where sometimes everyone is trying to talk over each other just to be heard. The worst part is that I never imagined that my friends and family would have to be thoroughly frisked and I would have to be strip searched before and after every visit.If you’ve seen movies where inmates have televisions or computers, forget it. There is one small television that gets 3 or 4 local channels for 70 inmates. It is placed in a small area with the only two tables we have for writing or playing cards. Life in a dorm is loud and crowded.Hopefully I’ve already convinced you that prison is a miserable place that you never want to experience for yourself. So far, I have told you about the frustration and the boredom, the violence that erupts occasionally, the constant noise of so many inconsiderate inmates and the unnerving startle when the guards suddenly shout at someone for good reason or just because they can. I’ve told you about some of the things I used to take for granted when I had my freedom, but I still haven’t told you about the very worst part of being in prison: Just being here. Every fence topped in circles of razor wire, every closed door, every wrinkled blue uniform, every barred window is a constant reminder of the wasted years ahead of me and the many innocent people’s lives that have been adversely affected because of the accident I so ignorantly thought could never happen. The two people I think about the most are the two that died in the accident I didn’t think could ever happen. Meagan Napier and Lisa Dickson were only twenty years old. They had their whole lives ahead of them. I think about them all the time and it hurts. Everyday I ask God why I wasn’t the one to die instead of them. If only I could trade places with them so they could realize the great lives they should have had, but I can’t and they can’t and I will live with that reality every single day of the rest of my life. I think about Meagan and Lisa’s families and friends a lot, too. I agonize over what I could possibly do to ease their grief and return their loved ones to them. But I cannot do that either and it is more painful than any amount of physical torture that could be inflicted upon me.Writing this has not been easy for me. It is really hard to talk about my existence as Inmate P22679, the feelings of worthlessness, the fear that I will no longer be capable of contributing to society when I am finally released from prison in 2022, the feeling that I have failed myself and my family, and the sorrow I feel for the loss of two beautiful human beings – Meagan and Lisa.

I’m writing this for them, their families and mine. It never seemed possible that my life could turn out this way. I bet you don’t think yours could either. I am living proof that it CAN happen to you.If you have a drink, driving simply is not an option. Don’t risk it, not even once, because it only takes a split second to go from a great future to Inmate P22679. Please don’t ever hesitate to designate a driver or to call a cab. Otherwise you may be riding in a police car or, God forbid, a hearse.

KARMA

Man It's true what they say about Karma. So today I go to exchange something at the mall. There is no one in the department to help me at the register. The ONLY employee I see is Mr. "I'm Too Old To Run A Register" (see earlier post) and he is busy helping customers on the floor. I surely didn't want to bother HIM. So I looked for the closest open register which in the department next door. I stood in line for about 2 customers and finally it's my turn. The nice older lady tells me that she couldn't help me there. I explained to her that no one was at the register but I would go back. She said "Oh let me page him for you!" I said no but she did it anyway. Boy, when I walked back to that department he was PO'd. "Did you have me paged?" "No", I said. "Well you walked right past me," he snapped back. He was totally rude from that point on. And of course it took him forever, I mean Forever to ring me up. He had to call a manager and everything. I wanted to vent my frustrations to the MOD but I refrained from doing so. He must have read my blog.

Merry CHRISTmas!!

We'll that was delightfully exhausting! Christmas Eve was spent with Brett's Family. All of the cousins played and played. Everyone had so much fun.

Trent was really into Christmas this year. We set out the reindeer feed for Rudolph and gang and cookies and coke for Santa. Trent said it must be coke and not milk because he saw that on TV. (Great commerical for Coke) He even wrote him a letter by himself. It said "Dear Santa, Thank You, I like your elfs and reindeer, Love Trent! Too Cute!! He was so excited to get his Power Rangers SPD Swat Truck and Men. Alyssa kind of new what was going on. She played and played with her Dora house. By the end of the morning she knew exactly how to rip open the presents. After our own family Christmas we made our way to my parents house, Nanny and PaPa. My sisters and their kids were waiting for us . We all had fun. And now we have the Christmas Blues.

Alyssa wither her crib, high chair and Dora House

Cousins Trey and Emily with Trent

Night of Lights

Last night we took the kids to Stone Mountain. We all have a season pass so it was all free. We saw the 4-D movie and walked around Santa's Village. I wanted to ride the Tram to the top of the mountain. That would have been so cool, but Brett was too frightened to. Trent and I were all ready for it. But maybe next time. They had put a Christmas tree at the very top. It was way too cold to ride the train. We toured the park of lights. It was a fun time.

A Day At Delta

So Today Brett took Trent to work with him. Since Brett has to be at work so early (6:30am) Trent was so tired when they got home. He had so much fun. I was worried that Brett's Delta Crew would corrupted him but they did ok. I guess I will really know in the next couple of days if Trent picked up on some "words" he shouldn't repeat. He got to tour an airplane and even sit in the cockpit. Last week he came to work with me one day. I guess Delta is more fun than Lassiter. Brett had him busy all day. And since several of Brett's cousins work out there too he got to visit family.

I just love this time of year. I especially love sending and receiving Christmas cards. I was a little later than usual sending them out than previous years. Sorry~ about that! I just couldn't get the picture that I wanted. Since the beginning of December I have been so excited to get the mail. Brett knows that I enjoy getting the mail everyday so he dares to touch the mailbox. All of the picture Christmas cards are great! It's probably the only time of year I get pictures of my friend's children. It's nice to see how much they have grown. I typically send out 100 Christmas Cards a year. That includes doctors, lawyers and other professionals. Is that normal? I don't want to exclude anyone. I hope everyone enjoys receiving my cards as much as I enjoy getting theirs. I will try to post over the weekend. I don't have to be back to work until Tuesday. Yeapee.

Texas Holdem'

On Tuesday night a bunch of my poker girlfriends got together for a little game of Dirty Santa aka. White Elephant game. We had fun. But they better watch out next month when we play. Brett's family has been getting together and playing some. I'm getting good.

It's so nice to get together with everyone every month. I look forward to just getting out and catching up.

To the Woman Who Thinks It's Ok To Breastfeed In A Resturant While I'm Trying to Eat.............

Here Comes Santa Claus.

We finally took the kids to see Santa on Friday night. It was a perfect time to visit him. There was not a sole in line. (Maybe because we went to Stonecrest and the "Traditional Santa" was there.) But Anyway, he was extremely nice. He took such time with the two of them. I was afraid that Alyssa would be scared but she wasn't. She went right up to him with no problems.

Afterwards we rode the train.

Bless Your Heart!

So yesterday I get home from work and Trent was already in his bed under the covers. So immediately I think that he is sick or something. So I said "Trent are you OK." "Do you not feel good?" He said, "Mom I'm sad." "What's wrong?" I asked.
He explained to me that yesterday at school his class made gingerbread houses. And when he got off the bus, Jake, our dog got a hold of it and ate it. Can you believe that? Poor thing. He was so sad. He wanted me to see it. I wrote the teacher a note asking her for directions on how to make it so we could make another one. Man, sometimes life just isn't fair.

Merry CHRISTmas!!!!

Last night we finally decorated our CHRISTMAS tree. That's right! Our CHRISTMAS tree. Not our holiday tree. Not seasonal tree. Not festive tree. Our CHRISTMAS tree. Each year we let the kids pick out a new ornament for our CHRISTMAS tree. Alyssa picked a Carebear and Trent of course got Darth Vader.

I just read an article in my local paper. I wanted to share.


Happy holidays? Retailers debate what to call season.

It looks like Christmas, smells like Christmas and feels like Christmas, but major retailers are shying away from the word and substituting "holiday," leaving shoppers confused, angry or pleased.

And the whole push-pull over marketing "Christmas" versus "holidays" has retailers scratching their heads about what to do next season.

* Lowe's home improvement chain removed banners reading "holiday trees" and replaced them with new ones reading "Christmas trees."
*Target stores are still being criticized for refusing to change their current "Gather round" theme. Last year, the chain banned Salvation Army bell-ringers, a decision that still stands.
* Even Wal-Mart, the nation's largest retailer, made "Home for the Holidays" its seasonal theme. The chain also told employees in general to greet customers with "happy holidays," giving them permission to use the word "Christmas" — when they think it's appropriate.
"Our people are urged to be smart," said Wal-Mart spokesman Dan Fogelman. "If they see Christmas goods in a basket, they can say 'Merry Christmas.' If they see a menorah, they can say 'Happy Hanukkah.' Same for Kwanzaa."
Wal-Mart was the target of a short boycott a few weeks ago because visitors to its Web site could not search for Christmas items but could find Hanukkah and Kwanzaa gifts. The company quickly fixed the site to allow "Christmas" searches.
* Macy's flagship Atlanta store at Lenox Square sports a 70-foot, 14,500-pound white pine laden with 4,000 red and green lights but it's called Macy's Great Tree, not a Christmas tree, said spokeswoman Ellen Fructman.
"You will see the word Christmas and Merry Christmas in holiday items at every register," she said. "Nobody has complained about the name of the tree."
Locally and nationwide, governments, too, have struggled with the issue:
* In Atlanta, Gov. Sonny Perdue's office did a quick-step reversal last Friday, sending out a release saying he would light Georgia's "holiday tree" at the Governor's Mansion. But that "news" was quickly changed to say he would actually light a Christmas tree.
* At City Hall, Atlanta has a 15-foot tall "Christmas" tree, decorated with thousands of traditional lights and ornaments.
* In Boston, the parks department was excoriated for advertising the lighting of a "holiday tree." So many complaints flooded in that Mayor Thomas Menino said he considered it a Christmas tree.
* What was billed as the "Capitol Holiday Tree" in Washington was renamed last week the "Capitol Christmas Tree" at the order of House Speaker Dennis Hastert (R-Ill.)

There should not be a debate about anything. I have always heard Happy Holidays, Seasons Greetings and Merry Christmas. It will always be Merry Christmas, a Christmas Tree and Jesus' Birthday to me and my family. Everyone needs to stop trying to be so politically correct. What da hell is Kwanzaa anyway? I had never heard of it until I worked in retail about ten years ago. Did someone just one day make it up?

So last night Brett, the kids and I went to see my nephew, Bryce, in his Christmas play at his school. He is enrolled in K-4 at a private church. It was too cute. He was Shephard #3 and even had a speaking part. Of course there were two or three little kids who cried the entire time they were on stage. But not Bryce. You could here him singing over everyone. Alyssa was doing her own singing. We had been there for awhile and her time was up. She no longer was interested in the program, so I took her out. I was so surprised to find in the lobby "the crying room." How funny is that? It was a room in the lobby that had a "you can see out but no one can see in mirror" overlooking the congregation and a speaker to hear the service. The room was sound proof. There were toys, a changing table and even a rocking chair. What a great idea!!

I finally decorated the house for Christmas. Although the tree was cut it's still under the carport. We will decorate it sometime this week. ****Warning for those who are pregnant. ****Last night was rough. Alyssa only slept for about an hour last night. Seriously. I'm not exaggerating. I don't know what was wrong with her. She tossed and turned and cried out. It was horrible. I was up all night. So needless to say that I'm working on about an hour of sleep. She decided to fall asleep about 4:45 am. I had to wake her up at 6:15 am. She slept while I dressed her and slept all the way to school. Poor thing. She is going to be so tired. I know I am. She doesn't appear sick, doesn't have a fever etc. So hopefully tonight she will sleep. ~~I just remember that there are no BAD times in parenthood just challenging ones.

Weekly Recap

Man! These weeks seem to fly by. I can't believe it's less than a month till Christmas. Is everyone done with their shopping? I guess the Barfield's will spend time this weekend decorating for the holidays. We actually go and cut one down ourselves. Brett's grandparents own a tree farm and it just happens to be across the street. So we put our hiking boots on and walk across the street and cut one. They no longer sell trees to the public so our supply is getting scarce. It won't be long until we will actually have to buy one. Brett being a traditionalist I doubt we won't ever resort to an artificial.

Nothing much happened this week . I'm still in shock that I will have to wait until MARCH 2006 for another new episode of Prison Break. That really stinks. December is when all of the shows are winding down for Christmas. So nothing but specials and reruns until January. At least American Idol starts in then. Maybe I will take this opportunity to do art crafts and make goodies during the week.

Tis the Season.

I hope everyone's Thanksgiving was great. It was so nice to be off and just relax some. The week sure went by fast. Does anyone watch the Macy's parade anymore? I still do. I love to watch the cheesy singers. They have to lip sing and it looks so fake. I like to make fun. Alyssa absolutely love it. It's a tradition so I watch it. My mom, sisters and I along with my sisters boyfriend and Brett's cousin (Megan) went shopping the day after Thanksgiving. Megan and I left at 4:00AM to began our day. We all had made our lists the day before and knew exactly what we wanted to buy. Megan and I started out at Kohl's and then met everyone else at the mall at 5:40. I know it's crazy but we really have so much fun and saved alot of money. The holidays are suppose to be a time of peace, love and good will towards men (Yeah right). People turn into monsters while shopping. I could tell several stories. Some lady accused Megan of stealing her paper towel in the restroom. Stupid. My patience runs thin during the holidays. People over 45 should not be allowed to run registers. Plain and simple. Stores should know this. I actually stood in line for 45 minutes trying to check out at Sears. And there were only about 8 people in front of me. I was so frustrated. But my $20.00 DVD was worth it. I guess. Stores should also have more cashiers, happily ready to service customers. Be cheerful and polite. It's YOUR job. You chose it. Tis the season.

My Baby Is Two!

Alyssa is two! Her birthday was Saturday. She was so cute. We had alittle party at Chuck E. Cheese. She was really excited to see some of her friends. Thanks for all who got to come. We had a busy day. I'm looking forward to the three's already. These terrible twos started alittle early. HAHA.

No work for me next week. And man am I excited. Not much going on just taking some vacation time before the end of the year. I like to save most of my vacation for this time.

Tomorrow is little Alyssa's 2nd birthday. We are taking her to Chuck E. Cheese. (I know~~ sooo much fun) We are arriving early hopefully to beat the crowd. Then maybe on Sunday drive down to south Georgia to see some of Brett's family.

I can't believe that it is Thanksgiving already. Eventhough I hate winter I am glad that it finally turned cooler for the holidays. It wouldn't be the same in 90' weather . Will anyone else get up at 4:00 am to shop on Friday? My mom, sisters and I usually do this. I really don't know why. Tradition I guess. I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving.

And now a rare appearance from......

Visits

The visit out at Scottish Rite went good. The x-rays showed no further development with the OI. Eventhough it is still noticeably present in the long bones of her body. (Arms and Legs) it wasn't shown to be in any other bones. There were no new fractures or breaks. Praise God! I was glad Brett was there to ask any questions that he had and she answered every single one. She said that Alyssa should live a pretty normal life. (Might have more breaks than others). We just don't have a future soccer or softball star. She can't play any contact sports of any kind and NO TRAMPOLINES. The doctor said that she checked the Scottish Rite database to see if she had had any other breaks since our last visit and was shocked to see that we hadn't considering that Alyssa is so active.~ you're telling me~ She suggested that we get Alyssa into some kind of activity (swimming, dance, acting, modeling) early so she would have some kind of interests so she wouldn't feel like the was missing something later. Bottom line: The good news is that it hasn't showed up in any other part of the body. We have to follow-up with the orthopedic in December and he will decide when the next x-rays should be (probably in 12 months).

Today is the Day

Ok! So today is the day that Brett and I have been waiting for for 3 weeks. We have to take Alyssa back to Scottish Rite to get the results from her x-rays that were taken in October. We've been taking her condition (OI) one day at a time. Everyone seems to think that I have been really, really calm about her bone dysplasia. Don't get me wrong I am upset that she was diagnosed but I look at it this way..... I can't change it. Only except it. Deal with it and adapt. She seems to doing well and hasn't had any more broken bones. **Knocking on wood** Alyssa is a very smart, determined little girl and seems to adapt to any environment. Thanks to everyone for your thoughts and prayers. I will keep you updated.

Weekly Update

Last week was a little busy and out of routine for me. Trent received his report card last Monday. He did extremely well. **Warning: Bragging Here** He got the highest in every subject that kindergarteners could receive. S's (Even in conduct) I was so proud. He seems to be adjusting really, really well and learning a lot. Wednesday night was "Girl's Game Night" On an average ten, friends from high school/college get together once a month and play games. We used to play Bunko, but we have recently switched to Texas Holdem. I have been watching Bravo every week to learn the game. We all are learning , except for Heather, who makes a living playing on weekends. Yeah! I lost. I haven't been able to go a lot but now that Brett's off nights it makes it easier. Brett did have his colonoscopy on Friday. Everything *laterally* came out fine. So that's great news.

Ode to Brett. He had a colonoscopy today........
HOW TO POOP AT WORK> > We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.> >

CROP DUSTING> When farting, you walk really fast around the office so the smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.> >

FLY BY> The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. P eople may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.> >

ESCAPEE> A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK> When forcing a poop, several farts slip out like a machine gun. This is> usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do> not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare> everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.> >

COURTESY FLUSH> The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.> >

WALK OF SHAME> Walking from the stall, to the sink, then to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you out. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.> >

OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER (O.O.T.C.P.)> A colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will often see an O.O.T.C.P. enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the O.O.T.C.P. before entering the bathroom.> >

THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N)> A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of O.O.T.C.P.'s, and identify SAFE HAVENS.> >

SAFE HAVENS> A seldom-used bathroom somewhere in the bui lding where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.>

TURD BURGLAR Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remainin the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.> >

WATERMELON> A poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on while someone else is in the bathroom, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.> >

CAMO-COUGH> A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.> >

ASTAIRE> A subtle toe-tap that is also used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you> are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is> occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the> pooper can poop in peace.> >

HAVANA OMELET> A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough in conjunction with an Astaire.> >

UNCLE TED> > A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to poop when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees

Please study this Survival Guide and implement them into your daily routine!

Hate Updated

Hate - verb- "To feel intense hostility or animosity toward"
Hate is a strong word, one that has caused great rifts in our society and great pain in many relationships. It's also a word that most of us utter nearly every day. I don't actually "hate" anyone that I know, but I hate dozens of inanimate objects and certain things that pop in on my TV. So I have compiled a little collection of a few random things that absolutely make me want to scream. It's nice to be able to vent . Please add comments.

Recently Added:

-Ketchup Packets
These little ba*#$%ds should be #1 on this list. I like ketchup. I especially like it with fries. The thing is, I only get about five fries worth of ketchup out of every packet. If I have a plate of fries, that means I need to awkwardly open and squeeze out SEVERAL ketchup packets to enjoy my meal. Those things arent always easy to open. I will estimate that it takes me 20 seconds to rip open and squeeze out each packet (as your hands get greasy, it becomes more difficult). I am wasting several minutes doing this.

-Commercial Employees
I go to places like Target, Best Buy and Home Depot quite often. You probably do too. The service at those places is almost always horrible, but you wouldn't think so judging by the commercials. How come in the Best Buy commercials they portray well-dressed, well-groomed middle-aged employees smiling and giddy about helping out the customers? I've never had an experience like that. Usually, I have to hunt down some long-haired teenager so I can ask him some question about my I-Pod.

Another time I approached an employee at Home Depot and asked for help in finding something. It has occurred to me that Home Depots slogan is "You can do it. We can help." Can you really? My mind flashed to the commercial. A proud and excited, yet flustered father stands in front of some lumber with plans in his hand. Out of nowhere, an outgoing and amiable employee comes over his shoulder and says, "Oh, youre building a tree house huh? Let me help you with that!" Where is that man? I never can find anyone.
Commercials showing happy and generous employees at these stores are just as false as perfectly melted cheese, crisp lettuce and fresh-grilled burgers in Wendys commercials. The burgers in reality are lopsided, mushy, and greasy.

-Subscription cards
Okay, has anyone ever actually plucked one of these from their People or TV Guide, filled it out and mailed it in? I hate these things. It's hard enough to find the article I'm looking for without these things getting in my way and falling out all over the place. You know. I'm siin the inthe doctor's office waiting to be seen. I pick magazine and a subscription cards falls all over the floor. That just gets on my nerves.

-People Who Don't Pay Attention While Driving.
I don't like when I'm in the turning lane behind some dude who isn't paying attention and I miss the turn errow or light. Some of these motorists are out of control. If you can't talk and drive at the same time, save your conversation for the home or office. Come On People!!

-Commercials About STD's

I'm fine with commercials during my favorite TV shows. They are also great for bathroom breaks and other distractions. But to see a person professing dieseasediease on TV and asking for help or plugging new drug is very annoying. The last thing I want to see while I am enjoying a nice meal infront of the TV is someone recalling their itchy, burning problem. There's just something about it.

-"I could care less"
People- stop saying it. It doesn't make sense. Say, "I couldn't care less." Tell other people to say it too. Help the cause.

-Time between Season Finales and Season Premiers.

Come on guys. End the suffering. During the summer months there is absolutely NOTHING on TV. Everyone come on over to my house because by the end of the summer I will be able to perform any kind of plastic surgery or makeover you want. I have learned them all by watching Discover Health and TLC over and over and over. By the Way... Did you know that someone could have a two hundred pound tumor and don't know it?

-$4.03
The other day at lunch my total came out to $4.03. There wasn't a little penny tray, and although I sighed and gave the cashier that "help me out, man" look- he didn't offer to just take my four dollars. So I had to give him five dollars and had to take 97 cents. Hate that. Why do they price things to come out that way?

- Self Check-Out Lanes

Ok. If you can't follow directions dont even try it. Listen people if you dont already know the self lanes are suppose to be swift transactions. So if you have 15 or more items please, please use the full service lanes. I can't even count how many times I have waited and waited for some moron to finsh his transaction.

-Teenagers Who Think That Itty Bitty Clothes Are Cool.
Are you kidding me? It looks horrible. Every time I see this violation it takes all of my strength not to walk right up to them and say "Did you know that your belly is showing, try not to use the heat when drying your clothes!" Poor Alyssa! If this is cool she will not be. What gets me is that someone has to be buying such things. Some parents today are a mess. Do they just not care? I would never let my child walk out of the house. Which lead me to......

-Parents Who Think Their Child Can Do No Wrong
Again~ are you kidding me???? Over and over again I see this. And Yes they can. Take off your blinders and wake up before its too late. I'm sure Ted Bundy's parents thought the same thing.

-Women With Hairy Toes

Since hopefully most women already participate in body gardening, please go the extra step and shave that big toe. Enough Said!!

-Chain Letters

This includes snail mail or email. I don't want to participate in any form. I believeeleive in "send this email to 7 friends within 10 minutes and your wish will come true" crap. So don't bother.

-Plastic Ties

If you have children or grandchildren you know exactly what I'm talking about. Why must every toy ever given to my children have these. It takes more effort to remove the toy from the box than it should. I am so tired by the time this gets done. Children become inpatient waiting for their new toy. ~~~Although I wish I had invented them.~~~~

Added:

-Multiple Receipts(Thanks Shanna for reminding me)

Why must all stores do Don't? Dont give me a gift receipt unless I ask for one. There is nothing more annoying that buying two items and getting 5 inches worth of receipt. Like she said!! Save the Trees.

-Christmas Before Halloween

It wasn't even Halloween and yet the local stores have their Christmas stuff out. What is up with that? Can't we enjoy one holiday at a time. It goes Halloween, Thanksgiving then Christmas or Hanukkah. I went to Garden Ridge the other day to look for Harvest things for Thanksgiving and there wasn't any. Just Santa Claus stuff. And 94.9 was even playing Christmas music all weekend. It takes the magic away for me.

That's all for now but I plan on updating this list periodically. Please forward me some more "hates" to add to the list.

Why Mommy's and Daddy's Differ.

Do you know why Mommy's and Daddy's differ?
1. Mommy's have routines and like to stick to them.
Daddy's do not. ~ I, for one, have a routine at night and in the morning. And I stick to it by the minute. If something throws off my routine I feel really, really rushed. Alyssa is to go to bed between 8:15 and 8:30. Alyssa and I had an understanding about this. ( It only took 1 month but she had it down.) But Daddy goes and throws her routine off. Daddy's little girl. That's what she is. Every night he lets her fall asleep in our bed then tries to move her to her room. Parents~~~~This will create a monster. Before his shift change she was asleep by 8:45. Not anymore.
2. Mommy's at all times usually know where their children are.
Daddy's do not.~ I worked all last weekend at the Atlanta Motor Speedway. On Sunday mid-morning I get a phone call saying "You won't believe what your daughter has done!" Now she's "my daughter. " My little artist had taken a thick permanent SHARPIE and decided to add "color" to my kitchen cabinets, drawers, table and door. "Where were you?" I thought. Enough Said!

Speaking of Alyssa~ I received another "love note" from a worker at her school. (It was a sub and not her regular teacher) The note said that Alyssa was being defiant. Defiant? What does that mean for a two year old? I know that Alyssa's little personality is coming out and she is testing her boundaries. But defiant is such a strong word for her age. Dont you think? I just shook my head. The next day I did confront the sub. And we talked it through. Alyssa is being very, very difficult right now. She is definitely going through the terrible twos. Our eating out days are coming to an end I'm afraid.

*Apologies to Julie and Rodney for Alyssa biting Macy at school**

The Flash and Minnie Mouse

By the end of the night Alyssa could actually say "Trick or Treat!" She even started to point to houses yelling, "Candy! Candy!" Yeap, Halloween is just not what it used to be. I can remember groups after groups of children knocking on my door when we were little. I guess with the world like it is today its a good thing that churches have their "Fall Festivals and Trunk or Treat" But going from car to car in a parking lot just seems to take the fun out of it. This year, since we don't live in a neighborhood, we did the house to house thing with Brett's cousin and his family. So here they are Flash and Minnie Mouse.

Brett went as a Tech Football player

and Keith was Mr. Clean again this year! (HAHA)
Here's a group shot of Willie Wonka, Anakin Skywalker, The Flash and Minnie Mouse.

Sorry So Late. Update.

I am so sorry that it has taken so long to update. I have been really busy both at work and at home. No more baseball till spring. I always look forward to the games but it will be nice to have a break. And plus it is getting too cold to be out at night. We are all adjusting well to the new shift. It is nice to have help at night with homework, baths, etc. We even got to enjoy "The Great Pumpkin" on TV. (I feel another Barfield tradition in the making)

For those of you who don't know ~~after having 6 broken bones this year, Alyssa was diagnosed this summer with Type 1 (OI) Osteogenesis Imperfecta. aka Brittle Bone disease. So yesterday she had to go have skeletal x-rays done at Scottish Rite to see if the (OI) is showing up anywhere else besides her arms and legs. She has had this done once before in March and it was horrible. They can't sedate or put the little patients asleep for this so it took 3 tech's to hold her down while she screamed Mommy! Mommy! for 1 1/2 hours. I had been dreading this appointment for 3 months. But little Alyssa was such a trooper. She did really well. It only took me and 1 other tech to hold her while another tech took the x-rays. She cried with the head x-rays, but other than that she did great. It's a lengthy process because they have to x-ray every bone in her little body. She didn't even move so they got all x-rays taken on the first try. It wasn't that bad at all and even the techs were nice. Not like before. Last time they all still thought we were abusers. Scottish Rite is an awesome place to go. I just hate sitting in the waiting rooms there. It's heartbreaking to see all of the really, really sick, disabled children. Everytime I leave there I feel so blessed. We have an appointment on Wednesday, Nov 16th for her results. (Her doctor only sees patients on Wednesdays~ must be nice!)

Isn't That The Truth

This picture says it all!!! HAHA! We had a wonderful weekend.Friday night Trent had his last regular season game. The coach wasn't there so Brett had to pitch. He did really good because we only had to use the tee a couple of times. We won 14-13. Yeah!!! My dad was our catcher because we was short one player. Not knowing he was my dad the team mom said "Poor Grandpa, he needs to get the game ball tonight!" He worked and worked to get all the balls that were thrown at him. On Saturday we met Brett's family at the pumpkin patch with the kids. They had a blast. 5 little boys and poor little Alyssa. (Not that she can't hold her own) It was my nephew, Dylan's 2nd Birthday. All of cousins had fun. Eventhough I go to the same pumpkin patch every year it doesn't get boring. We all had a blast. Man, what happended to fall? Winter is already here. I'm glad I took the time to change my closet around.

Weekly Recap

Man! This week has been an adjustment. To have Brett home at night has been nice. But I am so used to my routine that I have had for 2 years it's hard to change. We defintely need a bigger bed. We both are so used to having the bed to ourselves. Brett during the day and me at night. Waking up at 4:30 versus 5:30 has been rough too. I actually just lay there from time Brett gets up until its my turn. But with all of that said it has been great. We are finally living like a real family. I haven't had to cook dinner once this week. Although we have been very busy every night. Besides his baseball game I went and had all my hair cut off. Thanks, Charles! It looks great! I love it. I can barely put it in a pony tail now, that's how short it is. It sits on my shoulders. I feel so much lighter. This weekend we are going to the pumpkin patch. Until then.......

Out Standing Player

So these are the Ola MUDCATS. Don't you just love pictures like these. (Trent is standing right infront of Brett. Brett is the one without a hat) We'll only one more game to go. The team had their party on Tuesday night and Coach Chris handed out the trophies to all the players and the coaches. We ended up having our little party at Burger King, which was great because the kids could play outside on the playground.
Trent received another game ball that night for hitting the best . There's a picture. Also when it was Trent's turn to receive his trophy the coach said, "This trophy goes to the player who is our hardest and best hitter, Trent Barfield" The look on Trent's face is priceless. He was so excitied. He kept asking me, "Did I do good Momma? Did I do good?"

Sign up fee $50.00
Uniforms $55.00
The look on your sons face after receiving his trophy~~ priceless.

She's Gone.

Our baby. She's gone. Have you seen her? All we have now is a little girl. Since she has been sleeping in her "big girl" toddler bed for a couple of weeks with no problem I finally took her crib and changing table down. It's sad. I have no baby anymore. I don't even have to carry a diaper bag . I just use her Dora the Explora purse. I can't believe that in exactly a month she will be 2. Wow. Time does fly when they are infants. Thankfully I can still hold on to the fact that she still wears 24 months because when she gets into a 2T she's an offical toddler. Man! That's hard to grasp. Since she is approaching Toddler status we are trying "Time Out". It never worked with Trent but since every child is different we thought we'd give it a try. She has watched different children's video's on the subject and they have tried it with her at school. So I guess time will tell. I never believed in it before. Like Jeff Foxworthy has said " Yeah! My used Time Out. He took time out of his day to whip our A**" Because of her "OI" we have opted to get a toddler bed instead of a twin size one. Trent started out in a twin bed. I used to think that toddler beds were a waste of money, but we are afraid that she might fall off a twin bed and break something. A toddler bed is so much closer to the floor and I wouldnt have to worry as much.

Where Did It Go?

Ok! So Trent lost another tooth. That's two within two weeks. He is mortified because we can't find it. I think that he swallowed it. I guess we will find out in a couple of days>>>>>See other things Trent's swallowed>>>>>>
A Penny ~ Cool x-ray of it stuck in his throat.!!
We looked everywhere. I originally told him that there would probably be a delay in the "tooth fairy" visit because
we couldn't find the tooth. ( She didnt have change for a $20) But I couldn't let that happen. Quick thinking on my part. I took the money out of his bank that I had given him last week and the tooth fairy slipped it under his pillow Again. (Don't worry she will replace what she took) On another note:
Brett's first day on the day shift was "different". We acutally ate dinner at a normal decent time and together, which doesn't happen during the week that often. But we are going to have to overcome some challenges. (1) being the fact that he has to get up so darn early. 4:15 am . Man that stinks. We are going to have to put the alarm on his side of the bed so I don't have to get up to turn it off. And since Alyssa still wakes up in themiddle of the night (around 3 am) he is getting a little taste of my life that has been the last 6 years. Also Brett didn't make it home before the bus came. He was only 5 minutes behind her but she wouldn't let Trent off the bus without no one being home. So we are going to have to come up with something. Hopefully, Brett can tweek his schedule by 20 or 30 minutes to elimiate this problem. And since baseball is on the next couple of weeks I didn't have to worry about the TV rules last night. There wasn't anything on to watch anyways.

Weekly Recap

Isn't she cute?

This week has been really uneventful. Trent had a really good game on Monday night. He had two doubles and three good plays at third. He even got the ball at third and threw it at first for an out. AWESOME. We won the game eventhough the YELLOW JACKET cheaters had 7 year olds on the team. YEAH! We only have 3 games left. BooHoo. ~~~ Ok! So now that Brett will be on day shift starting on Monday, I will be available for my girlfriends monthly game night. So be aware! I am going to start practicing my Texas Holdem'. I've been watching Bravo so I am ready.

I am so Sore!

Man! I am sore! Brett's cousin, Megan, and I decided to start "running" a couple of times a week. Ok! So we only ran a little ways, but we walked really, really fast the rest. Then we came home, did 100 crunches and watched One Tree Hill and Lost. I have got to get into shape and lose some weight. The only problem is........ I have got to learn what to eat and not to eat. I am not a real "snacky" eater but I just could eat alot better than I do. I am going to have to make time to eat and eat right. I figure if I at least walk or try to run I will be working towards something.

Time. That's what I need more of. My day starts at 5:40am. That's when my alarm goes off. If I'm lucky and the kids stay asleep, I can get myself dressed and ready by 6:10am. Then I go and wake up Trent. I dress him while he is still half asleep and then let him lay there until Alyssa is up. I get Alyssa up, dressed and fix her hot chocolate to keep her busy while I finish up with Trent.(brushing teeth and hair) We are out the door by 6:45 am. I take him to the bus stop (at the end of our driveway) and the bus comes anywhere from 6:55 am to 7:05 am. I drive Alyssa to school and hopefully get there by 7:40 am and then off to work. I work from 8-5 with a wonderful hour for lunch to run errands or have a child free meal with co-workers or friends. Then I leave work at 5:00 pm, pick Alyssa up around 5:30ish and I finally get home around 6:25 pm. After dinner is done and homework is finished I put Alyssa to bed around 8:30 and Trent at 9:00. Then I get two whole hours to watch TV or whatever I want. Starting next week things will be better as far as time goes.... Brett starts his day shift and will be home at 3:00 pm everyday. Maybe if I'm lucky he can start dinner!!!

For those of you with Toddlers:

BITING

My teeth are here..... Hip Hip Hooray!
I wonder who I can bite today?!
I've got to try them out, you see,
I must find out if they'll work for me!!

My teachers say, "Now You Must Not Bite,"
"It hurts your friends and fills them with fright!"
So I'm trying to keep my teeth to myself,
And be nice, to my friends like a good little elf.

But please be patient as I go through this phase,
It is necessary to my development in varying ways
And I will continue to do my best
To use "My Words" when my emotions they test.

Alyssa received this little poem from school. Do they have one for pinching?

Weekly Recap

Sorry I didn't post on Friday. I finally got out of town on a short trip to the mountains. I had a very eventful week last week. Of course it was Trent's birthday and I got to eat with him at school. That was so much fun. Kids at that age are priceless. You never now what they will say or do. He was so excited for me to go. Alyssa did alright this week too. Although on Thursday I did get a report that she had a hard time listening. (Ok! She's almost TWO. Of course she does.) I never get it when I get these kinds of reports. What do they expect me to do? By the time I go to pick her up, she's not going to remember what she's done. If she had hit or bit I could tell her NO BITE or something. But not listening. I don't understand that. Thursday Trent came home with a loose bottom, front tooth. Of course he was mordified. But one mention of the toothfairy took care of that. Friday night it fell out in his sleep. He woke me up about 3:00 am saying, "Momma there's something in my mouth!" I knew what it was. We had left out Friday afternoon for the mountains. It was a nice trip. We walked through a couple of Festivals, went to Helen and took Alyssa to Cleveland to see Babyland General. She was really excited to see all of the babies there. We returned Saturday night.

But best of all Brett finally, finally got moved to day shift (M-F). We are so excited. He starts next week. We have been waiting for 5 years for him to the chance to work days. So next week will be an adjustment for us. I am used to sleeping by myself during the week. I did have to set some ground rules for him regarding my TV time. I get Sunday 9-11, Monday 9-10, he can have Tuesdays, I get Wednesday 9-10, Thursday 9-11 and he can have Fridays. He better catch up on Lost. Or that's what he will be.

PS~ Anyone playing Monopoly at McDonalds. Fill free to send me your game pieces. Call me lucky but I have already won 100 pictures from Snapfish.com. You can't win if you dont play.

FYI

I added some to HATE from the Sept. 15th post.

My Baby is 6

Can you believe it? Trent is six today!! Wow! I feel kind of old. Although 29 is an average age for a parent of a 6 year old. There are some that are younger and some that are older. I went and ate lunch with Trent and his class today. All of the kindergarteners are so cute. They look up to you like some superstar.T hey ask soooooo many questions. But after eating lunch in the caferteria with approx. 60 5-6 year olds I do have a head ache. For those who went to Jonesboro there was one teacher who acted justed like Ms. Acree. Oh! And there is no talking at during lunch. There is a big stoplight and you only can talk when the light is off red. It's amazing that most of them watch and listen. Because of Trent's "fear" of birthdays I didn't bring in any cupcakes. He didn't want me to. I am really impressed with the school. Trent is learning so much.

Don't Get Me Wrong......

I love Baseball, but................

I hate that I have to wait three weeks for a new episode of Prisonbreak. It is just getting good. You know a show is awesome when you are constantly screaming at the television during the whole hour. At one point I thought I had awoken the kiddies.

All of the Fox shows are making room for the Baseball playoffs. ~ So just be prepared!!


Trent's allergies have been really acting up this week. Poor thing. So bad his eyes were swollen. He looked like Rocky after a fight. He cried not to go to school. "Momma, I don't want the kids to see me this way." I took him to class and explained his condition to his teacher. He was fine when he got home. (I actually think he like the extra attention) He was all ready to go today and the swelling was down. I guess he knows that he can't play in the leaves anymore.

Tonight another baseball game. Speaking of that I'd like to call out the cheater Dodger team from last Friday. Using 7 year olds instead of 5-6 year olds. You should be ashamed!

Weekly Recap!

Man this week has really gone by fast! Monday Trent had a baseball game and he got a triple!! I was sooooo excited. I can't ever sit at his games. I am the typical team mom, always taking pictures. We've had alot of homework to get through this week because of the gas holidays. Alyssa has been having so much fun in her new class. Her teacher stopped me the other day and committed on how much Alyssa talks. I have always thought that she was a little "advanced" for her age. Trent didn't do half the things at her age that she does. She already speaks in complete sentenance. My favorite is when she asks herself "Where's my bobo?" Then she will also answer herself, "Hind you momma, hind you."
I have been really busy every night so I had to tape some of my shows. I will watch them this weekend. Trent has his school's fall festival tomorrow. He is excited. He also wants to go get his Halloween costume. This week he wants to be a clown. I have always waited until the week of Halloween to buy them because he cant ever make up his mind. But this year I am making him decide earlier. Why does my son always come up with some "non-boy" costume. A couple of years ago he was a chicken. I looked and looked for that thing and finally found one.I cant wait for the princess and strawberry shortcake costumes.

The Day Over

I started thinking today about the things that kids say. Trent absolutely loves kindergarten. I'm not sure what all he has endured since school started but he loves to go. He hates to go to bed at night though, that seems to be a constant struggle. Every night he thinks of some reason to not lay down. "I'm thirsty, I'm hungry, I need to go to the bathroom" and my favorite "I need a hug." I usually take this time to talk about school because he is so willingly to tell me then. If I were to ask him any other time he'd respond " I don't want to talk about it." So a couple of weeks ago during our bedtime talk he says, "Mom, can we just start this day over?" He had just had so much fun at school. His class had made Green Eggs and Ham and had done other fun projects. He was beaming. He just kept talking and talking. I only wish that his enthusiasm will continue. I know that every year will be a different adventure, but until then we will enjoy kindergarten. You go, Ms. Blanton.



"Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you know they are always there.

Busy, Busy

Man! I have been so busy this week and its only Wednesday! TIRED! That's what I am. Since Ole' Sonny decided to have a "gas holiday" my week has not been normal. Trent had to go to Noah's Ark with Alyssa on Monday and Tuesday. He didn't want to go to the "baby school" But I finally got him to go. Back to kindergarten this morning, so he was happy.

Anyway, here is a nice little message.......

Girlfriends

When I was little, I used to believe in the concept of one best friend, and then I started to become a woman. And then I found out that if you allow your heart to open up, God would show you the best in many friends.

One friend is needed when you're going through things with your man. Another friend is needed when you're going through things with your mom. Another when you want to shop, share, heal, hurt, joke, or just be. One friend will say let's pray together, another let's cry together,another let's fight together, another let's walk away together. One friend will meet your spiritual need, another your shoe fetish, another your love for a good laugh, another will be with you in your season of confusion, another will be your clarifier, another the windbeneath your wings, another your mentor. But whatever their assignment in your life, on whatever the occasion, on whatever the day, or wherever you need them, whether to meet you with their gym shoes on and hair pulled back, or to hold you back from making a complete fool of yourself ........ those are your best friends. It may all be wrapped up in one woman, but for many it's wrapped up in several .One from 7th grade, one from high school, several from the college years, a couple from old jobs, several from church, on some days your mother, on others your sisters, and on some days your daughters. So whether they've been there 20 minutes or 20 years, know that you are there for a reason. God has placed you in my life to make a difference.

Time passes. Life happens. Distance separates. Children grow up. Love waxes and wanes. Hearts break. Careers end. Jobs come and go. Parents die. Colleagues forget favors. Men don't call when they say they will. BUT...........Girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her can reach.Your girlfriends will be cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out. Daughters, Daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, mother, mother-in-law, aunties, nieces, cousins, extended family, and friends bless our life! The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would we.

Finally........

Last week was a bad week, but it ended AWESOME. Most of you know that I love Braves' games and got to go Friday night. After Heather and I ate a bite we made our way to Turner Field. I have been trying to get on the big screen for YEARS. I have made posters, waived, and acted like a fool. But nothing. Friday night was my Big Night. I only wish I had redone my hair and makeup. haha~ Of course you all know that I am not shy. So Heather talked me into going into the Bellsouth Allstar Karaoke booth. It was 95 degrees in there but I sang the best I could. Of course I chose a song that I already knew. (An up beat Reba song) Then somewhere near the 5th inning up comes my picture on the Braves Vision screen. They had picked me and another girl to compete against eachother. The entire stadium got to vote. And I WON! I got to sing at the BRAVES GAME! How awesome is that! Everyone around us kept asking "Is that you?" Then they showed Heather and I in the stands. It was great! DREAM COME TRUE!!! PS~I have a small video if anyone is interested! Always come prepared!! HAHA

My Weekly Recap

This week has been "for the birds" (to put it nicely). One of the the most "challenging" weeks that I have had in a while. But thanks to DELTA I can look forward to other "challenging" weeks to come.

It all started last weekend. For some unknown reason I have been breaking out in hives. I can't figure it out. Luckily, I got the hook up from Dr. Sandwich's office. Thanks~ Heather. I still have some hives but thank goodness I'm not itchy.

Alyssa has been sick with a "virus". * Note: That's what a doctor diagnosis if they don't know WTH it is. She had a temperature of 104 and looked miserable. At least the meds that she got helped her sleep. She is much better today.

Trent was accidentally pounded in the mouth with a baseball pitch during a practice with his daddy. We actually thought that would be the last time he would play. Trent doesn't take easy to any kind of pain. I am sure that everyone within earshot heard him scream, and DFCS was called. HAHA! But quick acting by Brett prevented this. He let Trent hit him back, which made him feel better. Within an hour from the accident Trent was back out there hitting the ball. He was swollen for two days. Trent's allergies/asthma have been acting up too. He still doesn't get how to blow his nose. Bless his heart he gets so frusterated with that. "I can't breave", he says. So I have had sleepless nights dealing with that.

On Monday Brett and I were shocked to realize that someone had gotten our account numbers and had been purchasing things in Spain! They started with our checking, then what we call our savings, then our visa. What a mess that has been! But the Delta Credit Union was really nice in handling our fraud. They cleared it up within 1 day, but it still pisses me off. They didn't even buy anything good. At least go to Best Buy or something.....

And without spending a lot of my energy on it, most of you know that Brett does indeed work for DELTA. So please pray for our family during this difficult time of transition. Also please keep him in mind with any jobs that you hear of. We would greatly appreciate it.

There was some good in this week though. Trent's first baseball game for fall ball was Monday. He did so good. He had a single and two doubles. His doubles were hit to the fence! I get so emotional and all worked up during the games. I'm going to have an aneurysm before the season is over. Trent also was STUDENT OF THE WEEK for this week. We are so proud. Look for my bumper sticker soon. He absolutely loves kindergarten.

I am going to the Braves game tonight! I can take a breather for a little anyway.

Well that has been my week.

Did anyone out there watch Lost? HOLY COW!!!! That show was awesome. Please email me so we can talk!

Lisa

Looking Forward continued....

Ok Here are honorable mentions in the television category....
One Tree Hill (WB) ~ Moved to Wednesdays at 8:00pm. The music is incredible and its another Dawson's Creek replacement. Chad Michael Murray is not ugly either.

America's Next Top Model~ Tyra Banks. This show is for amusement only. I love to watch these girls be so catty with each other. They are so funny. And Tyra makes them pose in different dangers. ( off of cliffs, with snakes, in water tanks.)

That 70's Show I absolutely love this sitcom. Everything about it is funny. But with the reruns playing all day and night it can get a little stale.

Extreme Makeover: Home Addition. Ty Pennington, need I say more. I love to watch the last 15 minutes of it as they give the Big Reveal.

Crossing Jordan I like this show but it interferes with Grey's Anatomy. I catch it on the rerun because I like Jerry O'Connell.

Has anyone seen the previews for Inconceivable on NBC? It has Ming Na from ER. It looks really good. The only problem with this show is that it is on Friday nights. And only loser's and couple's with children are home on Friday nights. But I will give this a try, since my Friday nights are free.

For the people who really, really know me... Know that I love TV/ and celebrities. Because you are my friends I will share with you all of the secret spoiler sites that I can.
BE AWARE SPOILER......IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE SPOILED DO NOT OPEN.

www.spolierfix.com-
www.futoncritic.com- This site gives tons of information on a variety of levels.
http://daysofourlives.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bethsdayspage.com%2Fdays%2Findex.html- if you like Days of Our Lives.. you will love this.
http://lost-forum.com/index.php- If you get Lost you will love this...........


Some other time wasters....
To look up any actor/actress use http://us.imdb.com/
Check out these mistakes. http://www.moviemistakes.com/film3144
If you like to win stuff check this out. http://www.online-sweepstakes.com/
Want to by food for cheap???? http://www.restaurant.com/about_gcp.asp?pgn=gcp

Ps~ For the Days of Our Lives Fans: I have an awesome spolier site but its for members only so if you want to know email me and I will be glad to share.

Always Something To Look Forward To...

You know... There is always something to look forward to. I have been waiting for this one week for almost 3 months... What is it you ask??? Season Premier Week. Or actually Month. Every year at this time I just so excited. It's starting to turn into fall which means FALL PREMIERS.

Let's start Sunday nights: Sept 25th. This is ABC night and I am getting Desperate. The housewives of Wysteria Lane are driving me crazy. This show has great writing. I love the not-so-washed-up Terri Hatcher and felicity Huffman is so funny. It was great to see her win the Emmy. It's well deserved. It's the mystery, the gardner and the plumber that keeps me coming back each week. (haha) And for all of you growing up in the 80's loving PatrickDempsy you need to watch Dr. Dreamy in Grey's Anatomy @ 10:00. I didn't think that I had anymore space for another hospital show, but I quickly got hooked. It came on as a mid-season replacement. It's a fresher ER to me. Monday nights: On occasion Trent and I have a little family time with 7th Heaven. I love to analyze all of their "situations". I have never been through 1/2 of things that poor family has. But at 9:00 when all of the kiddies are in the bed I can take a BREAK with Prisonbreak. Has anyone seen this new show? Two words..... Wentworth Miller. He is currently #2 on my top 5 list. It actually started the last week in August. This is very action packed and a little violent. But well worth watching. Tuesdays are very slow at the Barfield Estate. But if you like to watch people suffer you will enjoy NBC's The Biggest Loser. I actually like to watch this show. These poor people are working and starving themselves and are actually loosing the weight~ plus Caroline Rhea is always funny.

I have been waiting to get "Lost" on Wednesdays. Does anyone watch that? Holy Smokes. My brain is on over load trying to dissect what is going on. The Others, The hatch? It drives me crazy. If it hadn't been for my spoiler sights I don't think I would have made it through the season. But this Wednesday Sept 21st my wait is over. And The Best Show No One is Watching Award goes to...... Everwood. It starts again on Sept 29th. They have moved this to Thursday night this season. The acting on this show is unbelievable. Two years ago when my Dawson's Creek was canceled I had to find something to replace it and this was it. And of course for years now ER. Spet 22nd. They are adding some new characters this year. For some reason ER never gets old to me. As you notice all of my favorites are dramas. Sitcoms have been so boring. Friends was the only one I loved to watch. Since most shows are in syndication we can watch them any time there is nothing else to watch. I will continue this tomorrow......

My kids are smarter......

My friends are now split 80/20. Most with kids, some without! For a couple of years I was way ahead in the married/ with kids game. Finally everyone is starting to catch up. I like to think that I am the guinea pig and my friends have learned from my mistakes and what I like to call "challenging times." It's nice to have certain aspects of my life over but sometimes its sad too. For the group of friends with children...... Is it me or do all other kids (but your own of course) get on your nerves. I don't know what it is but that is happening to me. Why is that I wonder? I don't think that all of the time but I do think that a lot. And the constant comparing between my children and others has got to stop. I try and try not to do this. I am finding out that a lot of being a parent is worrying if my child is as smart or smarter than another child. I am also finding out that girls can be more difficult than boys. Or mine are that way. Alyssa is much more......"Spirited" than Trent ever was. For those friends who have two children..... How in the world do you block sickness from spreading from one child to another? It is impossible to do I have found. I used to bring my own disinfectant spray to the doctors office, but it is no use either. What's done is done. Just make sure that you get enough medicine for both children. For the 20% of you with no children. I could not imagine my life without mine. Although some days I long for a little peace and quiet and a moment to myself I would not give up all of the "firsts" I have endured.

I'm A Blogger!

Ok! I'm a Blogger. Go ahead make fun. It's OK.

But this is an awesome way to let everyone know all about me and my family. I wanted a place to share my feelings and daily trials and triumphs in my life.

So here is my first blog......

As I get older it just gets more and more depressing. Doesn't it? Everyone seems to be going along their way living their life. It's hard realizing that. Blink and you could miss something. I have a group of girlfriends that I have been friends with for a very long time. (You know who you are!) Every week I try to at least give a quick email or phone call to catch up and see what everyone has been going through in their lives. We may not get together as much as we like but just to know that I have friends and they care about me is a wonderful feeling. Not that you want it.... but my advice today is to not let friendships or family slip away. They may not seem important now, but I guarantee that they will be one day when you need them. I never realized this until (1) I got married and (2) had children. It's like certain things don't matter until then. Now I always make sure that I try to attend every wedding, funeral and baby shower that I can. Because when it's your big day you will realize how special it was that someone took the time out to attend special events in your life. Until next time.....

Lisa